To read my story from the beginning...go here

About Me

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Well, I am a mother of a 21 year old who is trying to find his way in this world. I am a military wife to a man that I adore. I am the daughter of two of the best parents in the world. I am a friend to those that are a friend to me. I am a teacher. I am a believer. AND NOW, I am a Lyme fighter!

Monday, February 29, 2016

New Beginnings

Hi Everyone,

I guess with wellness, you get too busy to keep up on your blog.  Lots has happened in the last few months. 

I began work in November.  I wanted to begin earlier, but there was a delay in my re-certification processing. I am subbing.  I wanted to begin with subbing to see if it was realistic to be back in the classroom next year and believe me, I am sure it is.  I'm so excited.  I have waited for this for so long.  When I first got sick, I didn't know if it'd ever be possible, but with God all things are possible.  It's been a very long road but I am happy to report, I am doing wonderful.  I am more than grateful.

Pat is retiring from the U.S. Coast Guard soon.  We have decided to make Alaska our home as we both have loved it since our first tour up there in 1997.  We will settle in the Mat-Su Valley in May.  He and I are going to rent a furnished apartment from some of our friends in Wasilla until we are settled and can pinpoint specifically what area we'd like to be in. We are both super thankful for our friends allowing us to rent from them temporarily.  It'll make this transition much easier. 

I am applying to schools now and am hopeful to be back in the classroom full time next fall.  I am considering taking some classes this summer to further my education. 

Pat is researching schools and jobs as well.  I'm hopeful he will have exciting news to share in the near future, but for now, he has a lot of researching to do.  I am thrilled about this new chapter for him as he will get to pursue his life's passion.  I know from teaching what it's like to do what you love and love what you do.  Don't get me wrong the CG has been good to us, but it's not his dream.  Not his love.  He has amazing times ahead of him, I am sure. 

Thank you for your support.  

Until next time, 

Thursday, October 29, 2015

For you, Pat

When we were kids, we were married.  Barely out of school. We began our life together so young.  I remember our first date at the Christmas Dance in high school.  We danced to George Straight's "I Cross My Heart" and I remember feeling connected to you even though it was only our first date.  Feeling safe.  Feeling special.

We began our lives together with Matthew,  something most young teen age guys don't want or care to do.  But not you.  You loved him.  You cared for him.  You were patient that our teenage beginnings consisted of loving a child and making him our first priority.

After our marriage we moved to Michigan which was a great experience.  I loved our hockey game nights. ;-) Something magical about our house in Charlevoix.  Perhaps that we were doing it-living together, being married, beginning.  Perhaps that we were young and in love, perhaps that we were healthy.  I'm not sure, but it was simply perfect.  Even having to save, save, save-soda cans to afford a pizza out once a month.  It was perfect.

Then you went to A-school.  I moved back home.  It was hard being apart, but we didn't have a choice so we did it. Right before we got our new orders and you came home, I was hospitalized with meningitis.  I was sick.  So sick.  I remember feeling like I was dying.  When we said our vows only a year before, I didn't think "in sickness and health" would come so soon. But it did.  I sort of recovered.  I got better from the actual meningitis, but from that day forward, I had headaches. Other symptoms. After that my health deteriorated over the years. Slowly but surely.

We moved to Alaska.  What a grand adventure.  It took me a while but I grew to love it, like no place I had ever lived.  It was so pristine.  Beautiful.  The land.  The people.  The community.  It was by far beyond compare.

We made another move to California so that I could follow my dream to become a teacher.  (Thank you for that by the way.  I could never have done that without your support.)  Which in itself presented challenges.  Challenges of me not being "well" and trying to balance married life and school.  I know I didn't do so well at that but I am forever grateful you were patient and allowed me to follow my passion.

Before we knew it we were back in Alaska, I was finishing up my Master's and certification.  Working. Not long after that I was teaching.  We did have some major challenges during this time, but we did it.  We made it.

As time pressed on I continued to get worse health wise.  I tried to keep up.  I tried to not let what ever it was that was making me sick keep me down.  But eventually, I was down for the count.  It was nothing short of a miracle that we were moving to California.  I'm sure looking back on our move, having access to so many specialists, saved my life, without a doubt.

I'll never forget when finding out what was "probably" wrong with me in Kodiak...going to the airstation, meeting you in your truck.  Telling you all about what we were about to face.  The fact that there might not be a cure, the fact that insurance typically doesn't pay for treatment, that there are only a few doctors in the country even willing to treat me.  All of that flew out of my mouth as tears were falling, and you looked at me as sincere as possible and said, "I just want you well."  You told me we'd figure it out.  Thank you for that.  Thank you for being on my side even when it sounded so scary.

I want to apologize to you for all the times my illness made your life so difficult.  I'm sorry that you were told I could stroke out and die at any minute because the pressure in my brain was off the charts. I'm sorry that we had 12 hour doctor days driving all over the state finding the best specialists to help me.  I'm sorry we sat in traffic for hours and hours and I was too sick to be good company.  I'm sorry we had countless spinal taps where you had to take me, comfort me, care for me and get me home so that you could go to work to provide for us.   I'm sorry that we had ER visits and admissions after you had worked all day.  I'm sorry that I probably scared you to death when I said things that weren't coherent, that didn't make sense, when I'd get lost in a store without holding on to you or Matthew.  I'm sorry for how this illness has been so hard on you.  I know it has. I don't always say so because it's tough to reminisce about such awful times, but I know it was horrendous and for that I am truly sorry.

I know you felt intense pressure to provide for me.  To get me well.  Medical bills were coming in.  Thousands of dollars here.  Thousands of dollars there.  And well, I can't imagine how hard that was on you.  At the time, I was too sick to understand the depth of that stress.  I still may not even understand it fully.  But you have always had a strong need to provide for me, for Matthew, for us and not seeing any end in sight of the costs probably took your breath away.  Thank you for sacrificing so many things so that I could get well.  I'm sure it wasn't easy selling your dream truck and getting an old Subaru to help financially for medical treatment, or to spend huge amounts of what we had saved. And for all the other "little" sacrifices financially that I cannot even begin to list. Thank you.  Without those sacrifices, I know I would not be here today.  You are the best provider I could ever ask for.  From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

It took me a great deal of time, to realize how hard this illness has been on you to watch me suffer. I think because I live in my body, I know what a good day feels like, it was probably easier for me than for you.  On a good day, I could feel little changes in my body. On a good day, I had hope.  On a good day, I felt encouragement.  But you, you didn't know. You couldn't know.  Not unless I told you and even then you still could only see what I looked like on the outside.  Back then my good days still didn't consist of much.  A shower maybe.  A movie.  A drive.  A "good day" must've been almost as scary as a bad day. Watching me suffer and endure was probably more difficult on you than on me.  I acknowledge that.

You want me to be well, and I want you to be able to follow your dreams.  Have a healthy wife so that you can take some time for you.  It has been hard to watch you put your life on hold to take care of me but in all honesty I am beyond grateful because there were times when I couldn't have cared for myself but you did.  You cared for me.  You gave me exactly what I needed.  You are an excellent caregiver, even though there is so much more to you than that.  I am hopeful that soon, you will begin to take time for you.  I am almost there and you, you deserve some time for you.

I think about what your life would be life without me.  It was hard for me throughout this illness to consider this idea, but I did often.  Because being my husband, was so hard.  Your life would've been so much easier.  You would've had more time to do the things you are passionate about.  You would've had more money to explore the adventures you'd most like to travel.  You would have so much less stress.  Yes, your life without me would've been easier.  But I acknowledge that you took the long, hard, difficult, road and you loved me through it.

Selfless is the word that comes to my mind when I think of my illness and you.  Some people may say that you can be selfish on occasion (but I guess we all can), but in this illness, in this walk, you have been the most selfless person I know.  You have given.  You have provided.  You have cared.  You have loved.  You.  Yes.  You. Have. Been. Nothing. But. Selfless.

For four years,  I have battled.  Fought.  Struggled.  I have been at war with all these things living inside my body.  Trying to reclaim what is mine.  Who I am.  But you, you are the real hero in this war.  You have fought, sacrificed, provided, loved.  You have been behind the scenes doing the most difficult job in this war.  You are so much stronger than you think you are.

Seeing me through this has shown me what an amazing man you truly are.  I wish I were more like you.  I don't know that I could have been successful if the roles had been reversed.  You are not only my best friend, my soul-mate, my lover, my husband. You are not only a great husband you are an excellent human being.  I wish there were more people like you in this world.

As I am getting well and applying for work, thank you for reminding me every time we talk about it that my health is more important than work.  You know me.  You know I would love to dive in head first, so your constant, loving, supportive reminders that my health comes before my career helps me remember that my most vital job is taking care of me.  Thank you for always pushing me to take care of me.

I know I don't say it often enough, but thank you for each and every single thing you have done for me.   Thank you for every sacrifice you have made for me.  Thank you for being you.  I'm not sure you know what a great husband you are.  It is not easy being married to a chronically ill person, especially me.  ;-) But you, you handled it with compassion, love, dedication, and strength.  I admire the way you have handled the last four years.  You really are amazing.  Amazing in every since of the word.  I can't imagine traveling this journey with anyone but you.  I could not have.  I know that.  I would not be here if it weren't for you.  You've taught me what it is to love.  You've taught me what it is to fight.  You've taught me what it is to never give up.  I am healthier because of you.  I am getting well because of you.  I am stronger because of you.  I am me because of you.

Thank you for being my everything.

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

My Fight Song

Months ago, I was on the phone with a very dear friend of mine, and she asked me if I had heard Rachel Platten's Fight Song.  I hadn't heard it, and I can't remember if I listened to it for the first time, when we were on the phone or when I hung up.  She told me this is your fight song.  She said, " Every time I listen to it, I think of you."

I liked it but it wasn't quite time for it to be "MY" song at that point.  Recently, it became my "Fight Song."  I let my husband listen to it and told him what my friend had said and he told me he could see why it reminded her of me.  That solidified it even more.  I have adopted this song on my journey to wellness.

Below are the lyrics with commentary...

Like a small boat on the ocean
Sending big waves into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

(This reminds me of home.  Where I'm grounded.  Near the ocean.  And how even though the ocean is so powerful, I am powerful too because I can make some big waves. Those of you that know me, know I love words and what they mean.  I love that she says, "Like how a single word, Can make a heart open," because that is so true.  Words when used correctly can be anything you want them to be or need them to be. Making an explosion with one match means to me, that I get one try, and I am going to succeed. Much like this journey.  I've only have one life, and I will get it back.)

And all those things I didn't say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time

(I am pretty reserved and generally pride myself in choosing words wisely.  Even if that means holding a lot in.  A therapist once told me, "you gotta get that out."  It can bounce inside my head all day long, but chances are I'm going to play it safe and keep my thoughts wrecking through my brain...except for when it comes to this fight...this moment. right here. right now.)

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me
(Most of this is self explanatory.  I am going to take back my life.  I will prove that I am alright.  I do have power.  Through God, I can do ANYTHING!  And- the part that reads, I don't really care if no one else believes, well, that's for those that have given up on me.  I get it, it's been a long journey.  It's hard to be friends with a sick person, but I do have a lot of fight left and I will succeed. That's a promise.)

Losing friends and I'm chasing sleep
Everybody's worried about me
In too deep
Say I'm in too deep
And it's been two years
I miss my home
But there's a fire burning in my bones
And I still believe
Yeah I still believe

(I have lost friends over being sick.  Many have fallen away.  I understand.  No grudges.  It is hard to be sick.  It's also hard to be a friend when you are sick.  It's also hard for friends to see you sick.  Many of my friends though, have remained loyal, good friends- and for that I am thankful.  For me, in my fight song, it's been four years and when Rachel sings about missing her home, I consider my "home" my old self.  The Ginny I used to be.  But there is definitely a fire in my bones that let's me know I'm still in there somewhere.  And yes, I always believe. Believe is one of my most favorite words.)

And all those things I didn't say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time
( I've already said what it means to me.)  

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me
A lot of fight left in me

(Already talked about this too. ;-))

Like a small boat on the ocean
Sending big waves into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion

(And this.)

This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care if nobody else believes
Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me
Now I've still got a lot of fight left in me

(And this.)

Isn't this the perfect song for me fighting lyme disease and other chronic infections?
I think yes, yes it is.  

For those of you that haven't heard it and would like to, please click the link below.  

Monday, July 20, 2015

4 Years In

4 years ago, I started treatment.  Doesn't seem real.  In some ways it seems like forever ago and in other ways it seems like just yesterday.

In four years, I have struggled.  I have cried.  I have lost.  I have been disappointed. I have known fear.  I have known Faith.  I have been thankful.  I have been a fighter.  I have accomplished.  I have conquered.

I think I have been on IV treatment for 2 of those years, though not consecutively.  I have had cocktails of many drugs.  I've taking countless oral meds, supplements, herbs, etc.  I think I've had a total of 4 picc lines and 2 chest lines.

I've gone from having a Master's Degree in Education, to being labled as cognitively impaired, and back to 90% of my cognitive function before getting sick.

I've gone from non-stop tingling in all of my limbs.  Now, it's rare.  A little more common when treating bart, but mostly gone.

I've had scares like when I was told I shouldn't be alive.  Or when I was told I needed a high risk brain surgery to put stents in the veins of my brain.  Yet, I've had some pretty sweet successes...Like when my non-stop fever for over a year finally broke for the first time.  I still get fevers but not a constant daily fever as before.  Another success was getting my intracranial pressure back into the normal range. Another success was going from awful, non-functioning, stop your world kind of headaches daily to a few a  month.  My processing time is almost back to normal.  My speech is rarely delayed.

In four years, I have come a very long way.  I keep saying it but I do mean it...I am extremely close to wellness.  Extremely.

Thursday, July 2, 2015

New Protocol...

On June 29th, I had a visit with my favorite neuro-opthamologist.  I have so many great docs on my team.  I really am blessed.

(Short recap...Last blog- we had decided to do 6 weeks of bartonella treatment.  This involved Rifampin, Levaquin, and Doxycycline. The doxy can increase intracranial pressure so my nuero-opth and my LLMD said we could try it for 6 weeks, do some tests and see where we were at.)

June 29th made 6 weeks... I was sitting at the neuro-opthamologist's office.  I love his office.  It has so many cool pieces of equipment.  I'm always tempted to touch things and play with them when I am left unattended in the room but mostly I try to refrain.  Anyway, as I was sitting there, I was a bit nervous to see what the doxy had done in 6 weeks.  Was it something we could continue or was it going to be marked off the list permanently.  (Doxy is a really good drug for lyme and many co-infections, taking it off the table is ok but keeping it on the table is much better.)

The medical assistant took me to do some testing and photos.  Afterwards, I saw the doc.  He said that my pressure had increased roughly 10% in 6 weeks.  Then he followed by saying no more doxy.  EVER!  He even listed it as an "allergy" on my online medical profile so that other docs would stay away from it.  I was disappointed but atleast now we know.

Two days later, I had an appointment with my LLMD.  She and I decided to take a 2 month break from all antibiotics unless I had symptoms reoccur.  This was so exciting.  I have been on antibiotics since 2011, minus one or two- 2 week breaks.  I felt like I was on top of the world.  Yahoo!

Three and a half weeks in, I began getting symptoms.  At first I tried to reason them away.  Well, my feet could hurt because I did more today than normal.  Well, I'm a little anxious because I have a lot going on.  Well, I have a headache because my body is recovering from Doxy and an intracranial pressure increase...yada, yada, yada, but then I got my friendly fever.  I call it friendly because it's almost always there with me when I am not well but it generally doesn't get too high.  Once the fever came, I knew it was time.  I needed to hop back on meds.

I made it four weeks with no antibiotics.  Then I started Rifampin, Levaquin, and Bactrim DS.  I've been on this protocol for 3 weeks now and I'm doing pretty well.  A little herxing now and then but not too bad.  What was interesting, was the Bactrim stirred up some babesia die off, I think.  I had a wave of vivid babesia babs treatment will be in the future.

I am going to continue on the bartonella protocol for a while.  I see my LLMD in September.  At which time, I think (I'm hoping she will too) that we need to address Babesia.  Overall, I'm doing pretty well though.  Good days and bad days, but even my worst days are no where near where they were 4 years ago.

Sunday, May 24, 2015

Babesia and treatment update

I was able to finish a round of Bartonella treatment.  I took 2 weeks off of treatment as per my LLMD's request.  That was awesome.  I am at the point now where I feel better off of treatment than on.  I feel like that's a nice transition.  I used to feel better on meds even with the herx reactions.  Just a little reminder to myslef at how far I've come.  Go me.  Yep, I just said that.  :-)

I was also instructed to do a babesia challenge.  Babesia is a malaria like parasite that affects red blood cells.  Symptoms include night sweats, fever, chills, air hunger-feeling like you can't catch your breath will sitting still even, vivid dreams-usually night terrors, and an overall feeling of "I can't handle this".

We treated Babesia early on, and for me, babesia has always been in the back ground.  It's never really had center stage like lyme, bart, and rickettsia have.  Just sort of there, mild, lingering.  So because we treated it, and symptoms of one infection can sometimes blend with other infections, it's been hard to say if we are finished with Babesia or not.  Some people who have babesia are really, really sick, and though I've been really, really sick; I haven't been babesia really, really sick.

Anyway, so we did this challenge.  Arteminisin is an herb known to address babesia, so I took arteminisin for a week.  The idea is that if I had a worsening of babesia symptoms, we need to treat babesia in the future.   Immediately, I felt like I couldn't breathe.  I was constantly feeling that way.  I was also more fatigued than I had been, especially off the meds.  Other symptoms seemed mild and some were even non-existent.

This means that we are not finished treating babesia.  And truly, it's good to know.  Sometimes, multiple infections are so thick they all blend together.  Other times, one is more prevalent than others.  When this happens I like to say it has center stage.  Babesia is lying in the background.  Bartonella still has center stage for me.

Our plan now, is to treat for 6 weeks for Bart.  We are doing a round of Doxy, Rifampin, and Levaquin.  Rifampin is a great drug for bart.  One of the best.  I had to have special permission to take doxy.  Doxy can increase intracranial pressure and because that is always an issue for me, we have to monitor closely, but my neuro/neuro-opthamologist said we could try it as long as we kept a close eye on what was happening brain-wise.  Doxy is a great drug for lyme and for bart.  Levaquin is also a pretty big gun for bart especially combined with the other two.

I was supposed to start meds today, but gave myself permission to take today (and possibly tomorrow off also) to rebalance myself after taking the arteminisin.  Once I feel more "normal" I will begin again.

I feel like I'm pretty brave, but this bart regimine has me a little scared.  It makes me crazy.  See my previous post.  It was soley dedicated to bart.  Pat says if I get too crazy he's putting me on a plane to my parents or to Alaska.  Which I'd love to do either, but not when I'm a hot mess.  So prayer warriors, feel free to keep me on your list.

In the meantime, everyone always asks, "how are you, really?"  And- I think I am super close to wellness.  I think lyme is under control.  I think I still have to work on bart and babesia, but when I'm not doing treatment, I feel a lot like me.  I have more energy.  I daydream about teaching again.  I think I'm super close.  Super, super close to wellness.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Bart is a bitch!

Bartonella.  Otherwise known as bart. Sometimes known as Cat Scratch Disease/Fever.  Is. A. Bitch.

Below are a couple of pictures of a Bartonella rash.  Most of the time they look like stretch marks, yet have sort of a shooting star appearance on one end.  Sometimes, they are more faint, but they almost always look like stretch marks but generally are positioned in a place one shouldn't have stretch marks.

When you have lyme and other co-infections, sometimes all of the bacteria and symptoms blend together.  While other times, one infection likes to take "the stage." Right now, for me, Bart is front and center and roaring loudly.  

Symptoms of bart are ugly.  Not that the other infections are a piece of cake, but for me Bart is truly for lack of a better word- a BITCH.  

So what does bart feel like:  it feels like sore soles, especially in the mornings.  It feels like intermittent fevers.  It feels like fatigue.  It feels like intense body pain.  It feels like dry eyes, irritated eyes, aggravated eyes, tired eyes, angry eyes.  It feels like pins and needles in all of your limbs- a constant state of neuropathy.  It feels like swollen glands and lymph nodes.  And all of that, I can deal with.  That's not that part that bothers me.  That. I. Can. Handle.  

The part of bart that is a complete bitch, the part that I can't handle are psychiatric symptoms.  That's the nasty part of this disease.  Bart has the ability to cause depression, a bipolar personality, severe anxiety, anger, rage, panic attacks-lots of craziness in the mental category.  

For me, I am generally happy.  It takes a lot to make me angry.  Truly.  I'm patient. Kind.  I love people.  But when Bart has center stage-I'm not even me.  I'm angry at the world.  I get mad at stupid things.  And not just a little mad, the kind of mad that consumes your body (and the crazy part is-when this happens, I know it's irrational, I know it's not me), but I CANNOT pull myself out of it.  It's like someone has sucked out my personality and spirit and put some sort of evil inside me...It's scary. It's ugly.  

Unfortunately, Pat gets the brunt of this.  Bless his heart.  I was pretty ugly this week.  Not myself.  Not at all.  And when I do pull slightly out, I can apologize but it's tough.  It's tough on him.  It's tough on me afterwards that I was so hateful and hurtful.  

We are actively treating bart right now.  We had it under control until I got sepsis.  Then I started getting some of my bart rash back.  My soles started hurting.  And more and more symptoms returned. So-the last time I saw my LLMD, we began to treat.  And treating it has been hard.  It's like I'm in this huge limbo of good vs. evil.  Happy vs. angry.  Me vs. bart.  God vs the devil.  

I'm pretty sure the meds have ramped it up even more.  Because we are doing pretty aggressive oral treatment and whoa- look out, I am not me.  I know I'm in here somewhere, but I hope the last act is soon and I can become me again.  

I'm struggling.  I'm struggling for sure.  I'm sure it will pass.  But, it's tough.  Really, really tough.  

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Parasites, Anyone? Why, Yes, Parasites!

*Warning* If you are easily grossed out, this blog post is NOT the post for you.

Parasites.  Did you know that a huge percentage of the population have parasites living inside them?  There are various studies giving specific percentages.  Most commonly, I have read that 80% of the population have parasites.  Sure there is the 50-75%, the 60-80%, the 75-90%, but most commonly 80%!  That is 8 out of ten people.  I might even venture to say, that I believe 100% of the population have parasites.

What are the symptoms of parasites?  They vary greatly.  But many lists contain these symptoms:
~Lowered immune system
~Rectal itching
~Difficulty sleeping or waking up
~Bloating, gas, distended stomach, diarrhea
~Sensitivity to food or chemicals
~Sensitivity to smells
~Brain fog
~Joint pain
I could go on and on, but you get the point.

I had a friend say to me about a month ago, "Ginny, I bet you have parasites. Have you been tested?"  My response was yes, of course I had been tested.  I was negative too.  And-then my friend said, "I bet you have them anyway."  I thought about this.  I did some research and from what I read I learned that parasite testing is not accurate, nor reliable.  An A-ha moment!  I can relate to unrelaible testing.

My friend suggested I take Diatomaceous Earth to kill parasites.  What is it you ask?  Diatomaceous earth is a naturally occuring, soft, sillicious sedimentary rock that is easily crumbled into a fine white to off-white powder.  It consists of fossilized remains of diatoms, a type of hard-shelled algae. (Wikipedia)  
In order to ingest it, you need to buy food grade.  Do not conusme any diatomaceous earth that is not food grade quality.

I thought, what can it hurt?  In all the protocols I have tried over the years this was cheap.  So- I ordered some.  Again, what could it hurt?

I started taking it on a Friday.  Friday the 13th.  I mix one tablespoon with water in the morning and at night.  (If you consume this, you need to drink plenty of water throughout the day and take the DE away from food...)

So I started taking this on Friday.  And on Sunday.  I passed a liver fluke.  Parasite number one.  It was this thrill between being excited I have proff I'm killling stuff in my body that doesn't belong there vs. being incredibly grossed out.

*Insert Pause here* In the lyme world, many people do coffee enemas.  They are a great way to detox. Many of my friends have done them, and do them religiously, but I couldn't bring myself to try it for three years.  Then, I finally decided I'd give in.  I ordered my kit.  My kit arrived and it sat briefly in the house and cursed me everytime I walked by it.  I was not motivated at all to try it.  I would've...but I was working up to it.

But on THAT Sunday.  The Sunday that I passed the liver fluke...I was completely motivated.  I boiled my coffee got it all ready and did my first coffee enema.  (That is a whole story in and of itself.  Comical and painful all in one. Another day perhaps.)  Anyway, after the coffee enema, I passed LITERALLY HUNDREDS of parasites.  Not just a few.  Hundreds.  Hundreds.  When killing bacteria we just hope, our meds are working.  Ya know?  We don't have any proof.  When killing the parasites, they are there.  You can SEE them.  And again, it's this crazy feeling of excitement, you are killing these nasty things reaking havok on your body AND being incredibly grossed out that all those things are living inside you.  GROSS!!!!

Food for thought...Parasite eggs are on 75% of salad bars in the US.  If you have eaten at a salad bar, chances are you have parasites.  Also-parasites can live in your body for up to 30 years.  Some even say 50!!!  Parasite eggs are virtually everywhere.

The DE kills the parasites.  The silica from the DE acts like little shards of glass to the parasites and shreds them, meanwhile, it is fine enough that it is safe for our consumption.   The coffee enemas pull the remnants of the parasites out of your body at a much faster rate.  Remember I passed one, on my own.  Yet, when I did the coffee enema, hundreds came out.  

I've been doing this for 11 days now.  I am passing parasites on a daily basis.  On the days I do coffee, I get a lot more.  I am constantly grossed out and excited.  Everytime I think I don't have any more, then here they come in my next passing.  Crazy!

I have read that if I do this for 90 days without missing a dose then I will have killed all of my parasites.  This covers all life cycles apparently.  Anyway, then, after the 90 days, I will be on a preventative dose the rest of my life.

SO after I passed so many on that Sunday, I woke up on Monday and felt better than I have in months.

I don't give credit to me feeling better soley to the killing parasites work.   We had increased my IV vitamin C dosage, and I'm on oral meds for the lingering sepsis, but I was getting better.  Slowly.  Very slowly, but I was making progress.  I think the parasite killing just helped push me to the next level of wellness.  Gave me a little umph to my progress already.

I'm convinced now, that everyone should kill their parasites with DE.  I have some pretty incredible pictures of the parasites I passed but I'm somehow not feeling so great about posting them here.  I guess if you are dying to see them, you could email me privately.

I also had a friend that did this with me.  She passed parasites too.  Only ours were much different.  We have different parasites.  Crazy!

Monday, February 9, 2015

Update: stays, sepsis, sickness, patience, thanks

So much has happened.  I've sort of left everyone out of the loop.  I was doing so well.  I was doing remarkably well.  Then it happened.  I got sick, really sick.

Shortly after Thanksgiving I began to feel bad.  Just more fatigued than normal.  More headaches.  I felt out of breath sitting still.  Just little things.  I just kept plugging away at life, but then December 8, Pat came in from work around midnight and all at once I was REALLY SICK.  I was throwing up.  I couldn't get warm.  My heart rate was 150+.  I had a high fever.  (Anytime you have a line in your body, and you have a fever above 101.5*, you are supposed to go to the ER.)  Off we went.  We spent much of that night in the hospital.  The hospital did a sepsis work up.

("Sepsis is a life-threatening complication of infection.  It often occurs in people who are elderly or have weak immune systems.Sepsis happens when the body suffers from an infection and the chemicals released into the blood to fight the infection cause inflammation over the entire body. Severe cases of sepsis can lead to septic shock. Septic shock occurs when the inflammation causes tiny blood clots to form, blocking oxygen from vital organs and leading to organ failure and a life-threatening drop in blood pressure." ~

At the hospital, I received two bags of IV antibiotics and two huge bags of fluid.  I had many tests.  Blood work, blood cultures, urine cultures, etc.   After the antibiotics and fluid, my stats all came back to normal.  Finally around 10 am the next morning the hospital ER doc, gave me the choice to be admitted until they got results from the blood culture or to go home and work closely with my primary doc and he would call me if my blood cultures were positive.  I went home and slept that whole day.  That was a Tuesday and on Wednesday morning I had a follow up appointment with my primary care doc.  On the way to that appointment the ER doc told me I needed to return to the hospital right away.  My blood cultures were positive.  I did in fact have sepsis.  He said that I needed to be admitted.

They pulled my line.  Gave me IV antibiotics and let me rest.

After four days in the hospital, they let me go home with some oral antibiotics. I actually began to feel worse.  The problem was that my blood cultures revealed that I had two types of bacteria growing.  One-that was really rare and there were few to almost no medical journals about this bug and no established guidelines on how to treat it.  The second bacteria wasn't able to be identified.  The lab tried to grow both bacteria to see what drug they would be susceptible to, but with no luck we were left guessing...pretty much.  My LLMD, the hospitalist and an infectious disease doc were all collaborating and trying to decide how to best treat.

By Tuesday, my LLMD had me call the hospitalist to see if we had any new information on the bugs and to tell him I wasn't improving.  This led to another hospital stay.  I had to go back in.  Thankfully the nurses from my previous stay thought I was a good patient and they requested me on their floor and gave me a private room. I felt like royalty.  Well as royal as you can staying at a hospital.  They put a new picc line in and we began again on IV meds.

Friday, I went back home.  Finally.  It feels good to be home when you are sick. There I did IV meds.  I was pretty much up and down until January.  In early January, we finished IV meds.  We had my line pulled.  And-I have remained incredibly sick.  I have had a fever everyday since (at least) January 15th.  My fevers are ranging from 99-101.7. I have slept many days away.  There were a few weeks in January where I think I was sleeping 20-24 hours a day.  I couldn't even bring myself to shower more than once or twice a week for about 3 weeks which is so unlike me.  I usually shower in the morning and take a relaxing tubby at night...

Basically, I'm not well at all.  The docs aren't sure what to do with me because at this point my sepsis should be cleared.  But I'm still so very sick.  My LLMD is working with my primary along with some infectious disease specialists.  Late last week, after consulting with other docs, my team decided to do some more testing because apparently after having sepsis, the bacteria can linger in your heart valves and continue to make you sick while not having a positive blood culture.  I'm waiting for that testing to happen.  I should hear something by tomorrow afternoon.

Meanwhile, I am still on oral antibiotics.  I'm also getting infusions once a week of 50 grams of vitamin C.  I'm still running high fevers, yet I seem to have about 2 days of lower fevers and even a few hours of being fever free after the high dose of IV Vitamin C.  My blood cultures are currently negative yet my white blood cells keep climbing every week.

It's been a really long haul.  Usually, during my sick times, I get a few breaks of feeling good.  I haven't had many.  And when I have, it's been really difficult to wake up the next day unable to function again.  I'm generally pretty positive, pretty hopeful but this has been rough.

Two weeks ago, I woke up on a Tuesday and automatically wanted a shower.  No self talk.  No "I think I cans".  I just did it.  And then I thought, maybe I could even leave the house today, by myself.  That was a huge, huge improvement.  Wednesday, was about the same.  Thursday was an LLMD day so long, tiresome, stressful, etc.  Then on Friday, Pat rescued me and took me away for a restorative and relaxing weekend.  One I needed no matter how bad I felt.  I even hung in there through the weekend but by the following Tuesday I was right back down- unable to function.  That was depressing.  A huge blow.

Since then, I've tried to rally.  But something is just weighing me down.  Whatever I'm fighting is tough.  Whatever this is -it's kicking my butt.

I've had several people ask me if I'm depressed.  Maybe situationally depressed because I feel so awful, but the second I wake up feeling even slightly better then I want to go do things, so no- I'm not depressed.  Something in this body is making me really, really sick.  This is by far the longest and the sickest I've been since 2012.  I think since Dec 8, I've had 5 hospital visits.  3 of which I spent way too much time there.

More testing this week.  More meds.  More prayers.  More hope.  More fighting.  That's where I'm at.  I am just really praying that this will soon pass and I can get back to getting well.

All prayers are greatly appreciated.

Thanks to those that have been checking in so frequently.  Thanks to Pat for driving me everywhere, for taking me to all the apts, hospital stays, waiting with me, visiting with me, taking me away from it all for a moment of happiness...And thanks to God, for keeping me here on this Earth a little while longer and giving me the patience to endure.

Friday, November 7, 2014

If you've followed my journey, this is one you won't want to miss. I promise.

Wow, it's been a while.  A long while.  Here's a much needed, more detailed update.

I have been in treatment for three years!  Three years!  Pat and I are both beginning to get impatient, I think.

Since February, I have been back on IV meds.  In August, September and October, I have had short breaks on the IVs due to reactions with drugs, waiting on insurance approvals, etc.

But- here's what's happening... I'm getting well.  ;-)  Can you believe it?  I am.  I can feel it all the way to my bones.  I am getting healthier and healthier.

My most recent bloodwork has looked pretty great.  My CD57 is above 100.  I think it's 124 to be exact.  For those of you that don't know what that means, (it's a controversial test but it's one many LLMDs use-and it's one that has been very telling for me) a 0-20 means you are severely ill.  Like practically dying.  21-60 means you are chronically ill.  61-200 means you are considered in good health.  Most LLMDs want your count above 200, they believe if it is above 200 you are less likely to relapse.  When I started this journey back in 2011, my CD57 was in the low 20's.  124 is a pretty awesome score for me.

My ESR-Sed Rate is in the normal range.  When I started it was off the charts high.  The ESR has something to do with inflammation in your body.  So-it's fantastic that mine's in the normal range.

My most recent Western blott, is no longer CDC positive, nor is it Igenex positive.  Yet, it's not considered a true negative by most LLMDs.  Not yet anyway.  It's going that way though.

When I started this journey back in 2011, I was really, really sick.  I don't even think I knew how sick I was.  I had virtually every lyme symptom on Dr. Burrascano's checklist.  My most prominent symptoms looked like this...

I had constant neuropathy.  My limbs felt tingly and like I had bugs crawling on them almost 24-7.  My headaches were ungodly painful.  The pressure in my eyes and my intracranial pressure was off the charts.  (Like doctors were saying they couldn't believe I had vision or that I hadn't stroked out and died)  My cognitive function was in the tank.  I went from having a Master's degree to being labled cognitively impaired by my neurologist through her testing.  I had trouble forming complete thoughts.  I was getting lost.  I was confused.  My words were often mispoken.  My thought process was extremely slow.  I made huge errors in thinking, doing.  I was a mess.  The brain fog was intensely deep.  So deep I didn't even feel like I was living inside my body. More like I was trapped inside and couldn't see my way out nor function in life like a normal person.  The inflammation in my body was so high that it hurt to be touched.  I remember many nights just being in so much pain I would simply whimper.  My veins felt like they were full of lead.  My fatigue was incredible.  I was a mess.  I could go on and on.  But I was a mess.

Today, I am almost well.  I am ready to think about working.  My neuropathy is completely gone.  My headaches are much less intense and happen less often.  My pressures are in a normal range (with meds).  My cognitive ability is back.  Maybe not 100%, but back that I am no longer considered cognitively impaired.  I'd say, I'm about 80-90% (cognitively) to what I was.  Almost normal.  My brain fog is completely gone.  My body doens't hurt like it used to.  My energy level is better than it's been in 3 years.  I still have some improving to do and stamina to build but it's getting there.  I am almost well.

Right now, my LLMD and I are going to run a few more IVs.  I have a few lingering things...that I think we need to improve on.  I think my Bart and Babs are just kinda hanging in there. (That has improved but not quite where it should be).   We need to kick those guys out of the body for sure.

But I am so close.  So close.  I can feel it.  I am almost there.

My future plan is to finish these last few lingering bugs off with IVs.   Then transition to herbals for maintenance.  I am also going to continue my supplemental IV treatment as I think this is doing wonders for me.  It is fantastic!!!  I am also taking a powder from metagenics that is considered a medical food.  I put it in a smoothie 1-2 times a day.  This stuff has be monumental in increasing my energy.  It's unbelievable.  I have only been taking it for about 3 weeks but it's amazing.

Lastly because my brain was in such bad shape, I am working on seeing a neurologist and getting some new MRI's of my brain so that we can see what things look like.  I am thinking it's going to look pretty great, but I'd like a little reassurance to know that it is infact time to stop the meds and transition to herbals.

So-that's kind of a lot of good things.

I even have been shopping for work.  I have applied to a couple of places for tutoring.  I think my brain is ready to teach again, but I don't quite have the stamina to be responsible for 20+ children 5 days a week.  Not yet, but it's in my future.  It's coming.  I'm almsot back.  I'm almost me again.

And-I am so in love with life.  With this journey.  With my people, my world, my life.  Pat has been the most amazing support system ever.  I would still be a mess if it weren't for him.  I know living with lyme has been a challenge for me, for him, for my family and friends, but the thing is- it gets better.  I get better.  I am better.  I am continuing to get better and better.  Life moves forward and we do too.  This journey has been amazing.  It's been scary, it's been tough, it's been rewarding, it's been enlightening, it's been hell, it's been precious, it's been happy, it's been a roller coaster, it's been so many different things.  I guess what I'm trying to say is if you are fighting lyme...keep going.  Believe in yourself.  Fight. Move forward.  You will get there.  We get better.  I am better.  Soon, I wil be back to me...happy, sparkly, sunshiney me.  I'm so close.  I know it's within reach.

This is one of my favorite facebook meme's.  I love it because it's so fitting for warriors like us.

Monday, November 3, 2014

It feels good to feel good

I've been on this lyme journey for over three years now.  Pat and I are beyond ready for me to be well.

I will post a more detailed update soon, but I did want to post a quick update this evening.

I feel good.  I have had a week, maybe longer of feeling really good.  Pat and I were able to go for a two mile walk on Saturday followed by a drive up to the snow  in the Donner Pass area.  We let Kiah out to play, had a late lunch date and headed home.  When I got home, I still had energy.  I felt good.   Energized.  A bit like the "Ginny" everyone misses.  Happy.  Chipper.  Full of smiles.
I do have an enormous amount of medical stuff and lyme updates to post, but right now in this moment just know that I am content.  I am better than I have been in a long time.  I am encouraged.  I am a little more like me everyday.  And with that...I am happy and thankful.  God is good.

Saturday, September 13, 2014


Today, Pat and I are headed to Indiana.  To see  Matthew.  Our 20 year old, army boy.  It’s been a year since I’ve seen him.  Never in my life did I think so much time would pass without seeing his handsome face and his wide smile.  

A lot has changed in a year’s time.  He spent 9 months in Kuwait.  He would have to speak to how he liked it as I cannot say for sure.  Yet, I can say I heard him become closer to his buddies than I ever have in the past.  It’s crazy to me (maybe because I’ve never been in the military) how much comrade develops when military guys are on deployments.  I’ve heard him discuss future plans, dreams.  Wondering in and out of ideas about school and how many career paths he’s interested in.  All the while maintaining that he loves he job (not necessarily the Army but operating heavy equipment) but wants to explore his world.

He’s begun a relationship with a former girlfriend from Kodiak.  One that I’ve always liked.  One that I think is a good partner for him.  One that seems to balance him out.  

I’ve heard him take an awful and very personal experience and make some really good choices in a moment’s notice.  And come out, wiser.  Looking ahead.  

We had Matthew when I was 17, and I know I made a lot of mistakesbeing such a young mommy, but today, in this moment as I reflect on his first full year on his own, (almost two now) I am pretty proud at his behaviors, his decisions, his accomplishments.  

It’s exciting to see him as a young adult.  I think it will be a grand adventure watching him continue his path.  Today, I will lay eyes on that boy -the one that continues to smile so brightly, and I will give him a big hug and tell him how proud I am of him and how much I love him.  

Being a parent is one of the greatest gifts.  I am thankful everyday for God giving me him.  

My Alaska Trip...

As most of you know, I had the privaledge of visiting Alaska for 16 days in August.  The place that I call home.  The place that I love...

One of my dearest and best friends had some medical appointments in Anchorage, August 12-16th.  When I began to plan my trip to Kodiak, I was disappointed that she would be away while I was visiting.  I tried to change the dates to make it so I woud be in Kodiak while she was also, but with getting all my medical needs in place it just wasn't going to be possible.  Then it occurred to me...why not stay in Anchorage a few days with her.  A little one on one time with her, plus-I had a few other friends I was really hoping to see that lived on the mainland, so I looked at tickets.  I was able to fly on mileage and layover in Anchorage without any extra cost to me.  YAY!

I arrived in Anchorage shortly after midnight the morning of the 12th.  My friend was there waiting for me.  Seeing her face greeting me, was definitely worth the long flight.  (I hate to fly.)  We got my luggage, found the rental car, drove out to the base, checked in, found our building/room.  By this time, I think it was around 3 a.m.  Where does the time go?  We hopped right in to bed because we had doctor's appointments all week long, mostly in the early morning.  But it was hard not to chat the rest of the morning away catching up on the last two years.  I love that when I see this friend we can just jump back to right where we were when we left off.  I think that's how it is for most of my friends.  I love that about friends.

The rest of the four days entailed very little time at the doctor's appointments.  Lots of time, doing IVs.  I had to do five bags a day, so it was a little bit frustrating but we squeezed it in.  Some shopping.  My friend had a grandbaby on the way so we had to do a little shopping for the new bundle of joy.  Why is shopping for baby clothes so fun?  I love baby stuff.  Such cute things.  We also relaxed quite a bit.

My previous neighbor in Kodiak has a house not far from Anchorage and she opened up her home to us.  We stayed there two nights.  It was so nice to see her and catch up.  It felt like her children had grown two feet and they were absolutely darling.  I so enjoyed having those two evenings just relaxing at her house visiting.  Reconnecting.  Remembering.  It feels so at home to be with people you love.

We also stayed one night and two days with another one of my dear sweet friends.  This friend and I never got to spend a lot of time together in Kodiak but I think it's fair to say we both felt very connected.  Connected because we had similar philosophies in education and in life.  I met her at North Star, (an elementary school I worked at) many years ago.  She was one of the warmest and friendliest people at the school as a newbie. We bonded in our friendship and as time passed she became a favorite person of mine.  Her children and I had a little history too, so it was marvelous to see how much they had grown and how funny they had become.  The kids were also so polite and respectful.  It's funny when kids get can really see them becoming little adults.  Of course I love kids of all ages but I really enjoyed spending a few days with them too.

On our last day in Anchorage, my friends and I went to the Anchorage market.  It was perfect.  Many booths of Alaska trinkets and treasures.  Some Alaskan food, snacks, etc.  We walked around for most of the day.  (A little challenging for me, but so worth the challenge.)  I love those kinds of things.  I love art, crafts, anything handmade.  It was great.  I think we all had a fabulous time.

Then a few hours later we headed on a plane to Kodiak.  Home sweet home.

While I was there, one of my friends loaned me her car.  That was awesome.  It gave me the freedom to come and go as I wanted/needed.  Thank you, friend.  I also had some a sweet Coast Guard family that I just love, let me stay with them.  Thank you friends.  I had an offer to acutally stay at another friend's house and it sounded quite lovely, but I never made it there...the first house was so cozy I just never moved all my stuff.  ;-) I felt so blessed to have everything fall into place so that I had a place to stay and a car to drive.

While I was in Kodiak, I tried to take lots of pictures.  I felt like I was home, but I also felt a bit tourist-y.  I clicked and clicked and clicked.  Fireweed, Abercrombie, salmon running in the river, bears, mountains, the city of Kodiak, the plush many pictures as I could to hold me over until my next trip and to share with those that have never experienced such a spectacular place.

I am super blessed, and because we lived in Kodiak for 10 years, and probably because I'm a social butterfly, I had lots of friends I wanted to visit.  So-I tried to see everyone at least once.  I missed out on just a few people, but I was fortunate enough to see all of my close friends.  And for the most part more than once.  The timing was a little tough on them.  School was starting and if any of you are educators, you can relate how crazy, busy you get at the beginning of the new year...but if you don't have that background- teachers work beyond imaginable hours when preparing for the new year and once the kids come.  It takes a while to get everything perfect, planned, in a routine, etc.  So-it was a little difficult for some of my friends as they had tons of stuff to do...but they rallied for me and made the best of it.  I so appreciate that.  I am so thankful that though my friends had millions of things to do, they still made time for me, and not just time for me, but time that made me feel very special.  I love my friends.  I love them so much.

Much of my time was spent visiting lots of loved ones.  I was also able to get some walks in- in some of my favorite places on the island.  I felt really motivated when I first got there and thought I could go up Heitman and I could go up Old Woman (Mtns I love), but I scaled myself back a little and decided I better not push myself too much.  So-I was thankful for the walks I got in.  They were perfect.

We spent a handful of nights bear viewing.  I was able to watch five bears while I was there.  From a pretty close distance even.  I never ever get tired of bear watching.  They are such magnificient creatures.  Watching them from a respectful distance is amazing.  It really is.

I had a few medical complications while I was there.  Nothing too awful but enough to remind me why we live in California right now.

You know when you teach, for me, I fall in love with my students and I just love them forever.  And as they get older they move on, but I always feel like they are my kids in a sense.  I really, really wanted to visit my previous students, to see how they were doing, how they had grown, what kinds of things they liked these days, but I felt like it would be a little weird for them (because they get older and way cooler) that their 2nd and 3rd grade teacher wanted to see them.  Another piece of me, wondered if  because of my brain infection, I wouldn't remember names and they would see that and be crushed...held me back from tracking them down.  I don't know, is it weird their 2nd/3rd grade teacher would love to see them all?  Anyway, I didn't pursue this.  But, God blessed me anyway, because one day I was able to see one little girl and her mother and my very last day I saw two more.

That was definitely magical.  I acutally on my last day had about 20 minutes one on one with a former student.  He was beautiful.  He had made so much growth.  Not just in education, but personally.  It's so neat when you see children and you know that they have the potential to be anything they choose to be, but they believe that too.  That is a special moment.  Kids get torn down their whole lives (most of the time not intentional but they do) and when they can hold on to themselves and continue to believe in themselves because you and a few others believed in them first, that my friends, well, brings happy tears to my eyes.  Nothing in this world like that.  This kid, all my kids, are amazing.  And I am so honored I was able to see some of his growth beyond just the years we were together.  He has big dreams, and I cannot wait to see them come true.

I could go on and on and on and on.  I love Kodiak.  I love the people.  I love the beauty.  I love teaching in that community.  I love the community.  I love the wildlife.  I love the outdoors.  I love everything about that little island.  I really really do.  I will forever be grateful that I had the honor of returning for a visit.  It truly was more than a blessing.

Below are a few of the pictures of my trip.

Salmon running in the river.

Hospital fun.


Coast Guard Boats.

Buskin River.

Salmonberry, yum-O!

One of the bears, I got to see.

Looking down on the city of Kodiak.

Love this shot.  

An art project by the Kodiak Highschool; recycled marine debris.  Pretty cool, huh?

The boat harbor.

Donna and I.

Another bear out fishing.

Ft. Abercrombie.

Ft. Abercrombie.

Ft. Abercrombie.

One of my most favorite people in the world, Janel. Love her.  

Ft. Abercrombie.

Ft. Abercrombie.

The view from one of my friend's houses.

Fishing  boat.

Enjoying the sunshine.

Enjoying Ms. Coke.

I love these ladies so very much!!!

Joyce and I.
Fran and I.
Grace and I.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Medical Update...9/11/14

I'm dying to write about my Alaska trip and lots of fun things, but I feel like I need to give a medical update and since my time is limited this week...I will start with this.

I'm just going to recap because it's been awhile...

In February, we decided IVs were needed based on symptoms and my MRIs of my brain.  So-we started by trying a peripheral.  That became a nightmare.  Then we opted to put a line in my chest, and began IVs.  Then, the clinic that does my blood cultures, had never seen a line in the chest.  They didn't like it, and insisted I get it removed.  They said it wasn't placed for optimal long term care.  So I had a new line placed in my left arm.  A week later, I had a clot along my line from my elbow to my chest in four different veins due to a traumatic line placement.

If you want to read about those experiences ~ Click here... and Here.

Then in May, I was really sick.  Lifeless sick.  Pat saved my life that month, I think.  I got a blood infection due to the blood clot, bacteria, etc.  To me, it was like the perfect storm.  You can read about that here.

Anyway, finally, I got a line that worked, and my blood infection cleared, and June was a pretty great month. But, by July, my PICC line in my right arm, was giving my trouble.  During dressing changes my arm muscle would spasm and the line would creep out.  Eventually, it was probably only to my shoulder or so, Pat, my llmd and I discussed a port, stopping IVs, etc.

After July's appointment, Pat and I left there confused.  It was the worst appointment we had ever had.  We both left confused and frustrated and to top it off we were charged $600 instead of our normal $350.  Anyway, it was very disheartening to say the least.

I planned a trip to Alaska in August.  16 days.  I will blog about that another time.  But-I had been feeling like health decisions needed to be made.  I had decided that I would go to Alaska.  Do my IVs.  And when I return I was really wanting to give my body a break from IVs and see how I did with just supplements and herbals.  A more natural approach.

Yet, when I returned, I got a letter in the mail from my insurance company that said my IVs were approved until February of 2015.  I felt like maybe that was a sign from God it wasn't quite time to quit on the IVs.  Then I went to my appointment and got some bloodwork...that reaffirmed my belief IVs still needed to be continued.  Despite feeling pretty decent these days, there's still a war going on in my body that needs more than just my immune system to fight, so alas, we will do more IVs.

I had a new line placed on Wednesday.  This time, I had a Power Line placed in the chest.  It is tunneled and I am super hopeful this will be the last time I need to change lines out.  Praying about that for sure.

It's crazy to me that my first time with IVs, I had one line. ONE LINE for 255 days with essentially no problems.  I think it clotted once.  And the second time around (since February...I've had one line in the chest, one in the left arm, one in the right arm, and now we are back with the fourth line in my chest.)  I really hope this one works until it's time to come out.

And so- I will continue on IV antibiotics for a while longer.  I leave Saturday to go see my cute Army boy.  He just got back from Kuwait a few weeks ago.  I will get to see him, my family, my husband's family.  It'll be nice.  I'm super excited about seeing family.  Not sure I'm ready to travel again.  Traveling is tough.

There are so many things I want to write about and I will -but for know that I am still plugging along.  Fighting all my bacteria in my body.  Working towards a healthier life, working towards teaching again, working towards becoming me again.

PS-455 days, I have been on IV antibiotics for 455 days-just not consecutively.  That's a long time.  ;-) Ready for a day where I am well without the assistance of medication.